The ten year-old brought the mail in today.
It stayed on the kitchen table for a couple of hours.
I’m feeling great this weekend because on Tuesday I’m expecting to walk out of my doctor’s appointment with two sneakers on.
Oh what the hell, I said to myself, it’s just mail.
I opened the forth and final piece. It was from The UCONN Medical Center. The bill for my surgery. I knew it before I even slid the letter opener across the top of the envelope.
No worries. I think the insurance paid most of it last year when I had the same exact surgery.
Here’s the funny part… and I’m still laughing.
The bill was about $10,000.
Are you ready for the punchline?
I own them half of that. HAAAAAAAAAAAA! HA HA HA HA!!!! HAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. OMG MY STOMACH HURTS BECAUSE I’M LAUGHING SO HARD.
Let me digress.
If you remember from some of my prior posts, I probably wouldn’t have even needed the second surgery (and the first one would have been much easier) if the first motherf**king doctor had read the X-rays CORRECTLY instead of telling me for three months that my ankle was broken. His prognosis was based on a film that showed NO signs of a break. And come to find out later, did indeed show the beginnings of a tumor.
SEE WHY THIS IS SO FUNNY? GO AHEAD, YOU CAN LAUGH ALONG WITH ME! OH… OH WAIT… WAIT THERE’S MORE.
A friend of mine is a lawyer and he shopped my case (medical malpractice or MED-MAL as we call it) around to several of the best lawyers in the state and they won’t touch it. I won’t get into the reasons why because I’m in such a wonderful freaking mood right now.
OH YEAH… LOL… THERE’S MORE… LOL… I HAVE VERY CARING AND LOVING FAMILY MEMBERS HELPING US TO GET OUT OF DEBT. LOL… AND WE WERE GETTING VERY CLOSE… (ARE YOU LAUGHING WITH ME?).
Yup… $5000 more! I sure hope that the insurance company screwed up and missed something here.
I sure am glad that I’m not a vengeful person that would make a neglectful doctor the focus of a crazy obsession of getting even. Never! Not me. I’m way too busy being happy.
The lyrics to this Sting song says it all, “I’m so happy that I can’t stop crying. I’m so happy that I’m drowning in my tears.”