Hi Friends.
My new home for Conversation Youth Sports (formerly A Sporting Dad’s View) is:
Besides youth sports, I’ll be writing about the little bits and pieces of life that are sometimes overlooked or quickly forgotten.
I hope that you’ll share my column with your friends and family.
Thanks!
Ron
The Boy (my fifteen-year-old) discovered lacrosse at a very late age. He was eleven. He was able to play two years in the local youth league.
He’s a freshman in high school now. He’s already played football and has wrestled at this level. He’s working out with some friends and getting ready for lacrosse tryouts.
I have no idea if he’ll get a spot on the team. I just like the fact that he’s got a goal in mind and is going to fight hard to achieve it.
I like the fact that every coach he’s had in high school so far has encouraged his players to play other high school sports.
The CIAC, which governs middle school and high school sports in Connecticut, includes the following philosophy in its handbook:
SPECIALIZATION OF SPORTS AT AN EARLY AGE
Specialization in one sport during the middle level and high school years, to the exclusion of most others, and too often at the expense of other equally valuable and wholesome activities, is at variance with the basic philosophical premise of American education, which seeks to produce well-rounded individuals with interests and abilities in many areas. Students should be discouraged from devoting all their energies and time to a single sport, but rather should be encouraged to allow themselves the experience of more than one sport. Boards of education should advocate and enact policies which encourage students to seek broadly based athletic experiences as well as broadly based academic programs. The school athletics program as well as community based athletic programs must be kept in perspective as providing experiences of many kinds for our youth.
The objective of the greatest possible personal growth of the student is best served by a varied program of activities, academic and athletic, which keeps proper perspective on the total development of the youngster from adolescence to adulthood, and which allows the student to do and be other things as well. School boards, school administrators, athletic directors, coaches, community recreation personnel and the parents of the student-athlete all have the responsibility of insuring that the student is afforded opportunities in several areas.
The formative years should be a time of growing in mind and body, a time of expanding horizons and outlook, not of specialization and narrowing of interests.
Common sense, right? What type of coach would think he or she had the right to preach anything other than those exact words?
Folks, they are out there. They are at every level of youth sports and planted in almost every town in this state. And it disgusts me. It should disgust you as well.
This is one of thousands of articles on the subject that you can access with a simple search.
So, why am I whining about this today? I just finished telling you how The Boy has been encouraged to play a different sport every season. I just quoted the CIAC handbook. I think I noticed most of your heads nodding in agreement when I suggested it was a common sense approach.
Well, I’m pushing the keys ten times harder than normal today because I just had a discussion with a high school athlete whose coach is pounding him with requests that completely ignore the advice that is clearly printed out for every single middle and high school coach to see.
And one would assume that such advice is clearly printed for all to see because it is expected that each coach will show good judgment by following it.
So, what can be done? It’s almost impossible for the CIAC to know what each and every coach is saying to each and every athlete.
That leaves it up to you – you, the parent of that child. If your son or daughter mentions over a bowl of Wheaties that Coach Jones is upset that he or she wants to play another sport, you have an obligation to that child to have a conversation with that coach – or with your school’s Athletic Director, or with your town’s Superintendant of schools.
If it’s happening at the pre-high school level, you should immediately contact the league president or your town’s recreation department. It is a despicable act of selfishness and poor judgment for ANY coach or league to dictate or insinuate the sports that your child should be playing outside of that sport’s normal season.
Hear me now: If your child wants to play one sport exclusively and you have no issues with it, that’s your decision. But it should never be because you or your child are being pushed or coerced by a coach.
That kid I was talking about? He’s good at his sport. He has just decided that he’s got too many more years of high school left to feel like he is being bullied into playing or training for that one sport year round. He told his coach he was going to do what he wanted to do.
I hope he follows through. It would be a shame if he missed out on being able to enjoy another sport. Of course he is fifteen-years-old already. What is it with kids these days? They just can’t seem to make up their minds.
Like every other person in the world, for my 40th birthday, I assembled a list of my 300 favorite songs.
Now, with only nine months until my 50th, it needs to be revamped and probably trimmed a bit. Just glancing at it today I can see 20 or so songs that have lost their magical powers over me.
I’ll give an example of a few songs that will be sent to the song heap: On Bended Knee, Don’t You Want Me, and One in a Million.
I’m always amazed how certain songs, after years of being twisted off the dial by us, can eventually jump onto our laps like an old blanket and seem to cuddle with our auditory senses uninvited. Sometimes we even ask them to stay. One such song for me is, Once In A Lifetime by Talking Heads. I hated that song 10 – 20 – 25 years ago.
There are so many interesting trends within my list. One could probably write an indepth analysis of my personality based on it. My darker side is most definealty a product of those songs that have never made it to the radio.
This list is not to be argued with for the mere fact that it is mine. In the intro below, I explained a little about the process and which songs were eligible.
December 31, 2003
My 40th Birthday
While compiling this list of my All-time Favorite Songs, something became very apparent to me. Some of the music is just downright awful. Many of the songs are probably considered as poor examples of American contemporary music. As you will soon see, critical acclaim was not a prerequisite for making this list.
I began to realize that most of these songs are timeless to me because of the special places they take me whenever I hear them: 186 Surrey Drive and dancing around the living room with my mother, listening to Casey Kasem’s Countdown every New Year’s Eve, or on the way to Moose Meadow for a family camping trip. Still, others serve as markers along the twisting paths that have converged to this very point of my life.
Some of you might think that it is somewhat odd, marking important life events with music. But I know that I’m not alone in this practice. Perhaps some of your own memories occasionally rotate around the inside of your head while a scratchy 45 spins background music.
This list has taken me almost two years to compile and edit. It’s been expanded, deleted, revised, and tweaked over and over again. And yet its body captivates and intrigues me with every viewing.
Why did I choose three-hundred songs? Believe it or not, the list once weighed-in at about 350. Three-hundred became the magic number when the process of eliminating songs began to feel as though I was losing bits and pieces of my musical soul.
Of course this list, much like our own personalities, is always evolving and could inevitably take a slightly different form depending on any number of circumstances. Music is especially unique in its ability to be pleasing one moment and irritating the next.
The only criterion for making this list was that each song had to have been at least a blip on the popular music screen. I didn’t want a list of obscure or unrecognizable songs that only I knew or appreciated. That’s another project for another time. So, check out the list and see if any of my songs would be included with your all-time favorites.
Without further delay, here is the soundtrack of my life.
| I’m Not in Love | 10 cc | 1975 |
| Dancing Queen | Abba | 1977 |
| How Long | Ace | 1975 |
| The One That You Love | Air Supply | 1980 |
| Sweat Dreams | Air Supply | 1982 |
| Undercover Angel | Alan O’Day | 1977 |
| Lonely People | America | 1975 |
| Lonely Boy | Andrew Gold | 1977 |
| Obsession | Animotion | 1985 |
| Sweet Love | Anita Baker | 1986 |
| Body & Soul | Anita Baker | 1994 |
| Only Time Will Tell | Asia | 1982 |
| Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head | B.J. Thomas | 1969 |
| How Come, How Long | Babyface & Stevie Wonder | 1997 |
| Manic Monday | Bangles | 1986 |
| I Write The Songs | Barry Manilow | 1975 |
| This One’s For You | Barry Manilow | 1976 |
| Copacabana | Barry Manilow | 1978 |
| Penny Lane | Beatles | 1967 |
| Hey Jude | Beatles | 1968 |
| Let It Be | Beatles | 1970 |
| The Long And Winding Road | Beatles | 1970 |
| Love So Right | Bee Gees | 1976 |
| Night Fever | Bee Gees | 1978 |
| Tragedy | Bee Gees | 1979 |
| Too Much Heaven | Bee Gees | 1978 |
| Stay The Night | Ben Orr | 1986 |
| Wind Beneath My Wings | Bette Midler | 1989 |
| She’s Always A Woman | Billy Joel | 1977 |
| Pressure | Billy Joel | 1982 |
| Allentown | Billy Joel | 1983 |
| With You I’m Born Again | Billy Preston & Syreeta | 1980 |
| In the Dark | Billy Squire | 1981 |
| Rapture | Blondie | 1981 |
| When I Die | Blood, Sweat & Tears | 1969 |
| Billy Don’t Be a Hero | Bo Donaldson & The Heywoods | 1974 |
| Butterfly Kisses | Bob Carlisle | 1997 |
| Don’t Worry, Be Happy | Bobby McFarrin | |
| I Can’t Make You Love Me | Bonnie Raitt | 1991 |
| Amanda | Boston | 1986 |
| On Bended Knee | Boyz II Men | 1994 |
| Anytime | Brian McKnight | |
| Love Is | Brian McKnight/Vanessa Williams | 1993 |
| The Way It Is | Bruce Hornsby | 1986 |
| Hungry Heart | Bruce Springsteen | 1980 |
| Kung-Fu Fighting | Carl Douglas | 1974 |
| Jazzman | Carol King | 1974 |
| Close To You | Carpenters | 1970 |
| Let’s Go | Cars | 1979 |
| Drive | Cars | 1984 |
| Wild World | Cat Stevens | 1971 |
| Oh Very Young | Cat Stevens | 1974 |
| Through The Fire | Chaka Khan | |
| Does Anybody Really Know What Time | Chicago | 1970 |
| Colour My World | Chicago | 1971 |
| Fool (If You Think It’s Over) | Chris Rea | 1978 |
| Sailing | Christopher Cross | 1980 |
| Time After Time | Cindi Lauper | 1984 |
| Clocks | Coldplay | 2003 |
| Easy | Commodores | 1977 |
| Sail On | Commodores | 1979 |
| Where The Boys Are | Connie Francis | 1961 |
| Too Hot | Cool & the Gang | 1980 |
| Southern Cross | Crosby, Stills & Nash | 1982 |
| (I Just) Died In Your Arms | Cutting Crew | 1987 |
| Same Old Lang Syne | Dan Fogelberg | 1981 |
| Please Come To Boston | Dave Loggins | 1974 |
| We Just Disagree | Dave Mason | 1977 |
| You Light Up My Life | Debby Boone | 1977 |
| Desert Moon | Dennis DeYoung | 1984 |
| Missing You | Diana Ross | 1985 |
| Walk On By | Dionne Warwick | 1964 |
| Dirty Laundry | Don Henley | 1982 |
| Boys Of Summer | Don Henley | 1985 |
| Sunset Grill | Don Henley | 1985 |
| The Day The Music Died | Don McLean | 1971 |
| What A Beautiful World (IGY) | Donald Fagen | 1982 |
| Minute By Minute | Doobie Brothers | 1979 |
| Touch Me | Doors | 1969 |
| A Little Bit More | Dr. Hook | 1976 |
| Lyin’ Eyes | Eagles | 1975 |
| Hotel California | Eagles | 1977 |
| Reasons | Earth, Wind & Fire | 1975 |
| Fantasy | Earth, Wind & Fire | 1977 |
| After The Love Has Gone | Earth, Wind & Fire | 1979 |
| Let’s Groove | Earth, Wind & Fire | 1981 |
| Can’t Get It Out Of My Head | ELO | 1975 |
| Mr. Blue Sky | ELO | 1977 |
| Telephone Line | ELO | 1977 |
| Your Song | Elton John | 1971 |
| Goodbye Yellow Brick Road | Elton John | 1973 |
| Blue Eyes | Elton John | 1982 |
| Empty Garden (Hey Hey Johnny) | Elton John | 1982 |
| I Believe In Love | Elton John | 1995 |
| In The Ghetto | Elvis | 1969 |
| After The Lovin’ | Engelbert Humperdinck | 1976 |
| Love Is The Answer | England Dan & John Ford Coley | 1979 |
| Tears in Heaven | Eric Clapton | |
| (Last Night) I Didn’t Get To Sleep | Fifth Dimension | 1972 |
| Stand Or Fall | Fixx | 1982 |
| Dreams | Fleetwood Mac | 1977 |
| Sara | Fleetwood Mac | 1980 |
| Hold Me | Fleetwood Mac | 1982 |
| Float On | Floaters | 1977 |
| Waiting For A Girl Like You | Foreigner | 1981 |
| Walk Like A Man | Four Seasons | 1963 |
| Rag Doll | Four Seasons | 1964 |
| It Was A Very Good Year | Frank Sinatra | 1965 |
| That’s Life | Frank Sinatra | 1966 |
| Sweetheart | Frankie & The Knockouts | 1981 |
| My Eyes Adored You | Frankie Valli | 1975 |
| Grease | Frankie Valli | 1978 |
| I’ve Found Someone Of My Own | Free Movement | 1971 |
| Summertime | Fresh Prince | 1991 |
| Misunderstanding | Genesis | 1980 |
| Lonely Man On The Corner | Genesis | |
| This Masquerade | George Benson | 1976 |
| Alone Again (Naturally) | Gilbert O’Sullivan | 1972 |
| Midnight Train to Georgia | Gladys Knight | 1973 |
| Neither One Of Us | Gladys Knight | 1973 |
| The Way We Were | Gladys Knight | 1975 |
| Cuts Both Ways | Gloria Estafan | 1989 |
| Just The Two Of Us | Grover Washington Jr. | 1981 |
| Sara Smile | Hall & Oates | 1976 |
| Adult Education | Hall & Oates | 1984 |
| She’s Gone | Hall & Oates | 1976 |
| Taxi Driver | Harry Chapin | 1972 |
| Cats In The Cradle | Harry Chapin | 1974 |
| You And Me Against The World | Helen Reddy | 1974 |
| Don’t You Want Me | Human League | 1982 |
| Centerfold | J. Giels Band | 1981 |
| I’ll Be There | Jackson Five | 1970 |
| Just Once | James Ingram | 1981 |
| One Hundred Ways | James Ingram | 1982 |
| Fire And Rain | James Taylor | 1970 |
| Thunder Island | Jay Ferguson | 1977 |
| Jane | Jefferson Starship | 1980 |
| Do What You Do | Jermaine Jackson | 1985 |
| Baker Street | Jerry Raferty | 1978 |
| Is She Really Going Out With Him | Joe Jackson | 1979 |
| Breakin’ Us In Two | Joe Jackson | 1982 |
| Life’s Been Good | Joe Walsh | 1978 |
| Imagine | John Lennon | 1971 |
| Starting Over | John Lennon | 1980 |
| Nobody Told Me | John Lennon | 1984 |
| Welcome Back | John Sebastian | 1976 |
| Just Another Day | John Secada | 1992 |
| Gold | John Stewart | 1979 |
| I Ain’t Missing You | John Waite | 1984 |
| Chances Are | Johnny Mathis | 1957 |
| Wonderful! Wonderful! | Johnny Mathis | 1957 |
| Too Much, Too Little, Too Late | Johnny Mathis & Deniece Williams | 1978 |
| Light My Fire | Jose Feliciano | 1968 |
| Who’s Crying Now | Journey | 1981 |
| World’s Apart (Seperate Ways) | Journey | 1983 |
| Valotte | Julian Lennon | 1984 |
| Carry On Wayward Son | Kansas | 1977 |
| Dust In The Wind | Kansas | 1978 |
| Constant Craving | kd lang | 1992 |
| Return To Pooh Corner | Kenny Loggins & Amy Grant | 1994 |
| She Believes in Me | Kenny Rogers | 1979 |
| Don’t Fall In Love With A Dreamer | Kenny Rogers & Kim Carnes | 1980 |
| Beth | Kiss | 1976 |
| I Was Made For Loving You | Kiss | 1979 |
| One In A Million | Larry Graham | 1980 |
| Stairway To Heaven | Led Zeppelin | 1970 |
| When I Need You | Leo Sayer | 1977 |
| Somewhere Out There | Linda Ronstadt & James Ingram | 1987 |
| All Night Long | Lionel Richie | 1983 |
| Hello | Lionel Ritchie | 1984 |
| Happy Anniversary | Little River Band | 1978 |
| Reminicing | Little River Band | 1978 |
| Brandy | Looking Glass | 1972 |
| What A Wonderful World | Louis Armstrong | 1968 |
| Superstar/Until You Come Back To Me | Luther Vandross | 1983 |
| Don’t Want To Be A Fool | Luther Vandross | 1991 |
| California Dreamin’ | Mamas and The Papas | 1966 |
| Monday Monday | Mamas and The Papas | 1966 |
| Blinded By The Light | Manfred Mann | 1977 |
| Let’s Just Kiss and Say Goodbye | Manhattans | 1976 |
| Sexual Healing | Marvin Gaye | |
| Morning After | Maureen McGovern | 1973 |
| Two Out Of Three Ain’t Bad | Meatloaf | 1978 |
| Don’t Cry Out Loud | Melissa Manchester | 1979 |
| Who Can It Be Now | Men At Work | 1982 |
| Got To Be There | Michael Jackson | 1971 |
| Bluer Than Blue | Michael Johnson | 1978 |
| Keep Forgettin’ | Michael McDonald | 1982 |
| Taken In | Mike + The Mechanics | 1985 |
| Lovin’ You | Minnie Ripperton | 1975 |
| Tuesday Afternoon | Moody Blues | 1967 |
| Nights In White Satin | Moody Blues | 1972 |
| Only The Lonely | Motels | 1983 |
| Broken Wings | Mr. Mister | 1985 |
| Heartlight | Neil Diamond | 1982 |
| Southern Man | Neil Young | 1970 |
| Old Man | Neil Young | 1972 |
| Mr. Bojangles | Nitty Gritty Dirt Band | 1971 |
| Don’t Speak | No Doubt | 1996 |
| Backstabbers | O’Jays | 1972 |
| Use Ta Be My Little Girl | O’Jays | 1978 |
| Get Here | Oleta Adams | 1991 |
| The Night Chicago Died | Paper Lace | 1974 |
| Come To Me | Patti Austin & James Ingram | 1983 |
| Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey | Paul McCartney | 1971 |
| Band On The Run | Paul McCartney | 1974 |
| Let Em In | Paul McCartney | 1976 |
| Silly Love Songs | Paul McCartney | 1976 |
| Still Crazy | Paul Simon | 1975 |
| Can You Stop The Rain | Peabo Bryson | 1991 |
| Next Time I Fall in Love | Peter Cetera & Amy Grant | 1986 |
| Puff The Magic Dragon | Peter, Paul & Mary | 1963 |
| In The Air | Phil Collins | 1981 |
| Wish You Were Here | Pink Floyd | 1975 |
| Roxanne | Police | 1978 |
| King Of Pain | Police | 1983 |
| I’ll Stand By You | Pretenders | 1994 |
| Around The World In A Day | Prince | 1985 |
| Pop Life | Prince | 1985 |
| Diamonds and Pearls | Prince | 1992 |
| Bohemian Rhapsody | Queen | 1976 |
| Somebody To Love | Queen | 1977 |
| Another One Bites The Dust | Queen | 1980 |
| Short People | Randy Newman | 1978 |
| Just When I Needed You Most | Randy Vanwarmer | 1979 |
| Jack And Jill | Raydio | 1978 |
| Scar Tissue | Red Hot Chili Peppers | 1999 |
| Take Me All The Way | Red Hot Chili Peppers | |
| If I Could | Regina Belle | |
| Everybody Hurts | REM | |
| Garden Party | Ricky Nelson | 1972 |
| Rock and Roll Heaven | Righteous Brothers | 1974 |
| Big Log | Robert Plant | |
| Killing Me Softly | Roberta Flack | 1973 |
| The Closer I Get To You | Roberta Flack & Donny Hathaway | 1972 |
| Where Is The Love? | Roberta Flack & Donny Hathaway | 1972 |
| Maggie May | Rod Stewart | 1971 |
| Tonight’s The Night | Rod Stewart | 1976 |
| Young Turks | Rod Stewart | 1981 |
| The Last Farewell | Roger Wittaker | |
| Emotional Rescue | Rolling Stones | 1980 |
| Waiting on a Friend | Rolling Stones | 1982 |
| Sympathy For The Devil | Rolling Stones | |
| Ain’t Nobody | Rufus With Chaka Khan | |
| Escape (The Pina Colada Song) | Rupert Holmes | 1979 |
| Tom Sawyer | Rush | |
| A Change is Gonna Come | Sam Cooke | |
| I’ve Gotta Be Me | Sammy Davis Jr. | 1969 |
| Candy Man | Sammy Davis Jr. | 1972 |
| Winning | Santana | 1981 |
| Hold On | Santana | 1982 |
| Never Gonna Let You Go | Sergio Mendez | |
| Wildflower | Skylark | 1973 |
| Tainted Love | Soft Cell | 1982 |
| Could it be I’m Falling in Love | Spinners | 1973 |
| Tempted | Squeeze | |
| Afternoon Delight | Starland Vocal Band | 1976 |
| Dirty Work | Steely Dan | 1972 |
| Rikki Don’t Lose That Number | Steely Dan | 1974 |
| Deacon Blues | Steely Dan | 1977 |
| FM | Steely Dan | |
| Oh, Sherrie | Steve Perry | 1984 |
| Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around | Stevie Nicks With Tom Petty | 1981 |
| Leather and Lace | Stevie Nicks/Don Henley | 1981 |
| Living For The City | Stevie Wonder | 1973 |
| Sir Duke | Stevie Wonder | 1976 |
| That Girl | Stevie Wonder | 1982 |
| These Three Words | Stevie Wonder | 1991 |
| If You Really Love Me | Stevie Wonder | 1971 |
| Fortress Around Your Heart | Sting | 1985 |
| You Are Everything | Stylistics | 1971 |
| You Make Me Feel Brand New | Stylistics | 1974 |
| Best of Times | Styx | 1981 |
| Mr. Roboto | Styx | 1983 |
| Come Sail Away | Styx | |
| Fooling Yourself | Styx | |
| The Logical Song | Supertramp | 1979 |
| Seasons in the Sun | Terri Jacks | 1974 |
| Voices Carry | ‘Til Tuesday | 1985 |
| Private Dancer | Tina Turner | 1985 |
| Jenny 867-5309 | Tommy Tutone | 1982 |
| Tie A Yellow Ribbon | Tony Orlando & Dawn | 1973 |
| Hold The Line | Toto | 1978 |
| 99 | Toto | 1979 |
| Roseanna | Toto | 1982 |
| I Won’t Hold You Back | Toto | 1983 |
| Meet Virginia | Train | 1999 |
| Drops Of Jupiter | Train | 2001 |
| Don’t Want To Wait Anymore | Tubes | |
| New Year’s Day | U2 | 1983 |
| Sunday Bloody Sunday | U2 | 1983 |
| In The Name Of Love | U2 | 1984 |
| One | U2 | 1992 |
| Walk On | U2 | 2002 |
| One Headlight | Wallflowers | 1997 |
| Careless Whisper | Wham! | 1985 |
| Greatest Love Of All | Whitney Houston | 1986 |
| Always On My Mind | Willie Nelson | 1982 |
| Owner of a Lonely Heart | Yes | 1983 |
| Born to Run | Bruce Springsteen |
Conversation Life 